On Not Being Bridezilla: What’s Selfish, What’s Not -PART I

Photo from: www.brides.com

You want to be a bride that glorifies the Lord. That means not being selfish, prideful, or greedy.

However, it isn’t God-honoring to do everything just to please other people. The Lord has given you your personality, your desires, and your own preferences. It’s not wrong to speak up when it comes to planning your own wedding.

At the same time, you don’t want to be “bridezilla.” It’s a fine line to walk.

Over the next few days, I’ll post some tips for figuring out if you’re falling into the trap of selfishness and for tuning your heart to the Lord while planning:

SELFISH: Treating Your Fiancée Like a Prop

Some grooms couldn’t care less about their wedding colors, flowers, or decorations. Others want to help pick everything out. Whatever the case with your fiancée, remember that it is his wedding too!

He probably has opinions about something wedding-related, like who is invited or what is read during the ceremony. Be sure to include him as you make decisions so that your wedding celebrates the marriage of two, not just you.

UnSELFISH: Keeping Your Fiancée In The Loop

Every guy is different in his attitude towards wedding planning, but there are some general “types”:

  • The “whatever makes you happy” groom who is happy for your every decision
  • The “what can I do?” groom who wants you to plan but will help as requested
  • The “my wedding too!” groom who expects to be involved in all of the planning
  • The “just do it” groom who would rather you and your friends and relatives figure it all out

Get ready to practice for marriage. You’re going to experience a whole lot of sharpening each other by identifying the strengths and weakness of each other’s attitudes. For every “type” of wedding-planning fiancée, there are challenges and benefits.

It isn’t selfish to ask your beau to help out more. At the same time, it’s isn’t selfish to work out compromises with the very-involved fiancée. Just because it’s more common for guys to have no wedding opinions doesn’t mean that their every opinion or preference is more important than yours.

As you and your future hubby plan the wedding, make sure it’s a team effort. That will look different for everyone, but it’s an important part of ensuring that your wedding isn’t just about you.


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